I know this from experience because I married and thought that I had fallen in love with a sexual Houdini, a master, a man who had researched, visualized and honed his craft. In retrospect, I thought I had fallen in love when instead I had been subjected to a calculated manipulation. Of course I went along for the ride because – well I’m not stupid, the sex was mind blowing. Also because I still wanted to believe in love forever and always, graying and getting old together, weathering the storms, blah, blah, blah – together.
I became wise to his training when 4-5 years into our relationship, he introduced me to his bible – The Tao of Sexology. I have since given it away. I guess I’m a slow learner, because it took me another 3-4 years to accept that without that book I would have seen a completely different person AND that what I thought was love was really just basic chemistry, biology and a bit of intoxication. He hid his true personality well for an exceptionally long time, bit by bit. After our son was born and we decided that I could stay home with baby – he began to say things like ‘ it’s my money, my house, if you don’t like it, leave’. Of course he was always sorry later or would attribute it to My stress level. But I digress.
Reading his 'bible' gave me lot of insight into his manipulation and explained a lot about those early days. The marathon sex sessions, aided by wine or bud that went on for hours and turned any hotel room, even his crappy little bedroom into a palace. All calculated and controlled. It explained his ability to go for days literally without ejaculating all the while going at with me for hours every day. Amazing, truly you should read the book. Of course later that skill simply pissed me off and I avoided him more and more as his true personality was revealed.
So I have come to the conclusion that we’ve all been duped and that we actually enjoy it. Love is and always will be simply your body reacting to a chemical change brought about by the right combination of touch, lies and intoxicants. The stuff about the heart is total bullshit – it’s a muscle and that romantic heart exists only in our minds and in the movies. So we buy into the bullshit, else the entire movie industry would collapse.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Marriage - How Badly Can We Suck
Marriage – a social experiment long past needing a make over. That's right, we've given it a good millennium or two and the jury has long been in – we suck at marriage in it's current state. So how about we re-visit the institution and it's terms. When I say we, of course I mean Americans. I also think that as a whole, we have some serious self esteem issues. Re-vamping this tired and broken institution could be a real ego booster. Our stock abroad would soar, or at least improve a bit.
First – marriage in its current state primarily benefits the husband – in hetero unions. I have high hopes for gay marriages, I hope that they set the standard in long term commitment. I know from experience what I speak because my husband didn't believe in marriage. I was married – he wasn't. His life went on as it had before and he kept his wedding bands (yes multiple) in an assortment of odd places – like the console of his car (that was later re-po'd and taken away) or at one point – on his key ring? I have no idea what that last one was about psychologically.
But marriage benefits the husband. Generally speaking. I have heard tell of a rare kind of union where couples share responsibilities and enjoy each others company, laugh, dance together. I've not witnessed nor experienced it so I cannot confirm. It benefits the husband because it's in our dna to give and care for and it's in their dna to pretend not to see and to be disabled, dim witted or in some other way impaired – when convenient.
Yes – I'm bitter. And a bit wiser – about the farce that we wax so poetic about, incessantly called love. But that's for a later entry. Marriage is an institution for the insane and it should be a union of like minded people who agree to co-mingle assets and body fluids for a guesstimated period of time. First of all if we all know that a life time commitment to anything is just silly. Written for a time when a life sentence was maybe 30 years – we now would have to go through 3 of those today. From there the contract could be as specific or general as you want it to be. Yes a contract between two people who agree to behave a certain way for the good of the pair or group as it expands, for a period of time, with liberal options to extend. Whether you choose to bring God into it is your preference. And as far as kids are concerned – who knows whether it's better to expose them to a loveless, selfish experiment in long term torture OR to the rigors of divorce. Either way, they will definitely have topics to discuss in group.
I think that if marriage vows were written to reflect our collective attention spans we would be better at it. We would also have to revise how marriage statistics were reported. That would be a real image and self esteem booster. So if a couple contracted for 5 years with an option and chose not to renew – that would go in the success column. Our numbers would soar as would our reputation abroad. Wow – check out the Americans – 92% success rate – how do they do it?!
I envision a time in the distant future when this relic called marriage will be gazed at with great wonder and amazement. Picture it – 500 years in the future a father and son in a museum. "Wow, Dad – you mean people actually stayed together till they died? That would be 130 years with the same person!" Well they didn't live that long way back then, son. Still it would amount to 70, 80 years. Yep. I hear tell that men would have affairs and order catalog brides. It was a crazy time. Now go find your fifth step sister and 3rd mom twice removed so we can go get lunch."
It could happen.
First – marriage in its current state primarily benefits the husband – in hetero unions. I have high hopes for gay marriages, I hope that they set the standard in long term commitment. I know from experience what I speak because my husband didn't believe in marriage. I was married – he wasn't. His life went on as it had before and he kept his wedding bands (yes multiple) in an assortment of odd places – like the console of his car (that was later re-po'd and taken away) or at one point – on his key ring? I have no idea what that last one was about psychologically.
But marriage benefits the husband. Generally speaking. I have heard tell of a rare kind of union where couples share responsibilities and enjoy each others company, laugh, dance together. I've not witnessed nor experienced it so I cannot confirm. It benefits the husband because it's in our dna to give and care for and it's in their dna to pretend not to see and to be disabled, dim witted or in some other way impaired – when convenient.
Yes – I'm bitter. And a bit wiser – about the farce that we wax so poetic about, incessantly called love. But that's for a later entry. Marriage is an institution for the insane and it should be a union of like minded people who agree to co-mingle assets and body fluids for a guesstimated period of time. First of all if we all know that a life time commitment to anything is just silly. Written for a time when a life sentence was maybe 30 years – we now would have to go through 3 of those today. From there the contract could be as specific or general as you want it to be. Yes a contract between two people who agree to behave a certain way for the good of the pair or group as it expands, for a period of time, with liberal options to extend. Whether you choose to bring God into it is your preference. And as far as kids are concerned – who knows whether it's better to expose them to a loveless, selfish experiment in long term torture OR to the rigors of divorce. Either way, they will definitely have topics to discuss in group.
I think that if marriage vows were written to reflect our collective attention spans we would be better at it. We would also have to revise how marriage statistics were reported. That would be a real image and self esteem booster. So if a couple contracted for 5 years with an option and chose not to renew – that would go in the success column. Our numbers would soar as would our reputation abroad. Wow – check out the Americans – 92% success rate – how do they do it?!
I envision a time in the distant future when this relic called marriage will be gazed at with great wonder and amazement. Picture it – 500 years in the future a father and son in a museum. "Wow, Dad – you mean people actually stayed together till they died? That would be 130 years with the same person!" Well they didn't live that long way back then, son. Still it would amount to 70, 80 years. Yep. I hear tell that men would have affairs and order catalog brides. It was a crazy time. Now go find your fifth step sister and 3rd mom twice removed so we can go get lunch."
It could happen.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Recovery
I am a recovering atheist. I think I’m at the acceptance phase, or step 11 in the 12 step program. I’m now saying that my higher power is me. Religion and all that it stands for is all just way more work then its worth.
It pains me to say it since most of my family professes to some degree of Christianity. But I doubt that any of them will be reading this, so I have a certain amount of freedom. Also, considering a few of the people who have boasted of their love of God, - Jim and Tammy Faye Baker, Jerry Falwell, George Bush – they have embarrassed some of us who have been hanging on by a thread anyway.
I’ve always felt impaired when it came to spirituality. I didn’t feel what everyone else seemed to feel, never felt any better after prayer, or the guiding hand of anyone in my life. It’s like whatever language was being spoken, I didn’t speak, didn’t understand or there was too much static on the line. And can someone please explain to me why ‘speaking in tongues’ all sounds strangely alike? It’s all – la, la, la, la, followed by gibberish, then some more lalala’s. But anyway, I never got it or felt anything spiritual or mystical. But I stuck with it, hoping that I too would feel the certainty and satisfaction that my peers seemed to have. I’ve been away from the church too – always returning after a few years, hopeful that I would get it this time. Well, no more. Done that, been there.
It always starts the same with the initial honeymoon stage. That’s when everyone likes you and each other and we’re all one in the spirit. Then the cracks in the façade begin to show – sniping amongst the chosen leaders, someone is seen somewhere ‘inappropriate’, the occasional out of wedlock or extramarital pregnancy and finally straight up insanity – someone is dis-fellowshipped or asked to leave the flock. The level of hypocrisy in some churches is astounding and I will no longer take part.
The attraction to religion and supreme beings is seductive and self serving, particularly as we get older. The closer we get to the ‘jumping off’ point, the more we want to believe that there is something, anything else. I understand that. Whether you’ve had a privileged life or a life of poverty and pain, as you near the end you’re bound to think – ‘is that it, no do-over, no bonus plan?’ So I get part of the attraction – it’s like an insurance plan for the ever after. The religion that you choose then determines what kind of pay off you’ll get – heaven, virgins, re-incarnation or as Scientologists believe – evolving on to another form. You pay into the plan as you go by following the rules and protocol and by recruiting others to do the same. Recruiting is big in all religions, you must get others to believe and behave as you do.
I would like to create a religious smorgasbord of sorts, where you get to pick and choose all the things you like in a cafeteria, ala carte. I would then load up on the extra lives thing. I think this is why celebrities are converts and followers of Ron L. It’s all about the benefits package, the chance for a spiritual do over and rewards for a life of piety and compassion.
It pains me to say it since most of my family professes to some degree of Christianity. But I doubt that any of them will be reading this, so I have a certain amount of freedom. Also, considering a few of the people who have boasted of their love of God, - Jim and Tammy Faye Baker, Jerry Falwell, George Bush – they have embarrassed some of us who have been hanging on by a thread anyway.
I’ve always felt impaired when it came to spirituality. I didn’t feel what everyone else seemed to feel, never felt any better after prayer, or the guiding hand of anyone in my life. It’s like whatever language was being spoken, I didn’t speak, didn’t understand or there was too much static on the line. And can someone please explain to me why ‘speaking in tongues’ all sounds strangely alike? It’s all – la, la, la, la, followed by gibberish, then some more lalala’s. But anyway, I never got it or felt anything spiritual or mystical. But I stuck with it, hoping that I too would feel the certainty and satisfaction that my peers seemed to have. I’ve been away from the church too – always returning after a few years, hopeful that I would get it this time. Well, no more. Done that, been there.
It always starts the same with the initial honeymoon stage. That’s when everyone likes you and each other and we’re all one in the spirit. Then the cracks in the façade begin to show – sniping amongst the chosen leaders, someone is seen somewhere ‘inappropriate’, the occasional out of wedlock or extramarital pregnancy and finally straight up insanity – someone is dis-fellowshipped or asked to leave the flock. The level of hypocrisy in some churches is astounding and I will no longer take part.
The attraction to religion and supreme beings is seductive and self serving, particularly as we get older. The closer we get to the ‘jumping off’ point, the more we want to believe that there is something, anything else. I understand that. Whether you’ve had a privileged life or a life of poverty and pain, as you near the end you’re bound to think – ‘is that it, no do-over, no bonus plan?’ So I get part of the attraction – it’s like an insurance plan for the ever after. The religion that you choose then determines what kind of pay off you’ll get – heaven, virgins, re-incarnation or as Scientologists believe – evolving on to another form. You pay into the plan as you go by following the rules and protocol and by recruiting others to do the same. Recruiting is big in all religions, you must get others to believe and behave as you do.
I would like to create a religious smorgasbord of sorts, where you get to pick and choose all the things you like in a cafeteria, ala carte. I would then load up on the extra lives thing. I think this is why celebrities are converts and followers of Ron L. It’s all about the benefits package, the chance for a spiritual do over and rewards for a life of piety and compassion.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Pain is Good
I have this cousin, who shall remain anonymous, (rhymes with Fark) , who is the personification of lazy, has a PhD in lazy and hence causes himself and others much pain. Also my dear sister, having been seduced by the complacency and ready made excuse of that marginal and completely laughable religion - Jehovah's Witness, whose work experience totals less than 6 months, the same - with a Master's in Denial.
I have noticed the same trend among many young people that I've come to know primarily through my daughter, who is gradually coming to grips with this very basic principle or truth. Here is that truth - Pain is Good. It serves its purpose and without it we would not be able to experience joy. But we seem to be in a perpetual pain avoidance mode and it is encouraged by medical doctors, pharmaceutical companies and professionals.
Ultimately total pain avoidance leads to greater pain then if we had endured and worked though the pain initially. We were born to pain - labor pains. Chances are we'll go out to pain - many won't have the good fortune of going in our sleep, dreaming of breakfast or flying on angel wing, then simply floating away - like my 97 year old aunt did. Of course we don't really know. She could also have opened her eyes one last time, looked around at pictures with the clear eyes of a 20 year old, at the comfortable old slippers and her favorite coffee cup. Maybe in her minds eye she looked at her little apartment - more pictures and gifts from grand kids and greats, the kitchen that she only yesterday had used, that last little slice of cornbread or banana bread she'd been saving for coffee and the home attendant who lay sleeping on the sofa. She might fret about her being the one to find her cold and still in the morning. Maybe she then thought sadly 'I'm gonna miss you all so. Then maybe - she closed her eyes and was gone.
So my point is this - pain is a part of life and we should not only accept it, but embrace it as affirmation that we're dong the right things. In other words, if there is some suffering on your part - it's probably a good thing. Example - if you're looking for a job then you should be tired at the end of the day. Looking for a job is a job. You have to start early and end late. You have to juggle, coordinate schedules, plan your time and have a game plan. To do the things you need to do should and will drain if you're doing it right.
Good pain - makes you stronger. You have to know the difference between good pain and bad. Going to the gym and being sore after - good pain. Working on a piece of equipment and feeling a sharp stabbing pain - bad pain - you should stop and get a demonstration from someone who knows. Spending an hour or so cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming and sweeping, putting away clothes, is an aerobic activity - good pain. Burns calories, de-clutters the household so that everyone can think and is gratifying to you and can be a source of pride. Good pain.
Doing that kind of work only to have someone come home and belittle, criticize, bully and insult and possibly brutalize or at least keep you in a constant state of fear - Bad Pain. Your response should be to work as hard as possible to get out. Don't hide behind a religion that prohibits or discourages divorce from a crazy person. The person who is brutalizing you, that you are allowing to hold you hostage, doesn't need spiritual counseling. He might need long term substance abuse rehabilitation, he might need job training, skill building, support groups - his issues are so beyond the scope of a group of old men wagging fingers and reminding him of his spiritual responsibilities. Once again - Bad Pain.
If your teenager wants a new game system and you've set some grade point requirements, that teen will be stronger and better prepared for life if he/she puts in the time and effort to attain that grade point average. If you're willing to devote your time to something, exercise your brain or muscles, you will be rewarded and the work in itself is both healthy and rejuvenating. The longer you embrace it the better you feel.
Whereas, being lazy, looking for the short cuts in life the hook ups, freebies, doing the bare minimum, is exhausting and only marginally effective. You end up working harder avoiding work then if you had done the work in the first place. You know what I'm saying - you do a shoddy job today, you'll just end up having to do it over later on, possibly damaging some of the key components or losing them, so when you do you have to buy more parts, incur more expenses, delays, etc.
Getting 'free money' from the state - sounds good, might not be. There are some unspoken expenses when you take money from the state - strings attached that you should consider. It's like inviting the government into your living room and having to offer them pastries and coffee; they how have a say in everything you do. The government has an extra pair of eyes watching you. You're getting aid for food to feed your children, then they can verify that you are using it for that if they choose to. Granted those eyes are distracted and overworked at best and they have so many families that if they are looking, it's only a glance at best/worst. But it's called Temporary Assistance to Needy Families, emphasis on temporary. That means that you should be working your butt off trying to get to a point where you don't need it anymore. Move out of the way for people behind you on their way up the food chain.
But back to my cousin ' Fark'. This man is in his 50's now and to use the word sporadic to describe his work experience is stretching the word as far as any semi-literate person cold. I've known him to quit jobs because he didn't want to go home from a party. So F-it, this party is so hot, I'll just skip going to my second day on the job and for that matter the 3rd. through never returning. Seriously. He's shacked up with weak women solely for an address. He's had to go crawling to his smug older brother over and over for money while having to endure the visible shame, pity and outright revulsion his brother has for his place in life. One good thing is he hasn't had any children with these ill fated liaisons, so no little 'Farks' running around avoiding work and working harder.
So get comfortable with 'Pain is Good. It's going to be around for a while and with you for a while. Just be able to tell the difference between good pain and bad. To feel pain and work through the suffering and sacrifice and then realizing the reward of progress is the stuff of life that makes the sweetest memories. These will be the stories of courage that you will tell your kids and grands. They will then use them as guideposts and anchors to help them on their way in life. These are the things that make up legacies and family histories to be witnessed to at family reunions and should be memorialized. Pain is Good.
I have noticed the same trend among many young people that I've come to know primarily through my daughter, who is gradually coming to grips with this very basic principle or truth. Here is that truth - Pain is Good. It serves its purpose and without it we would not be able to experience joy. But we seem to be in a perpetual pain avoidance mode and it is encouraged by medical doctors, pharmaceutical companies and professionals.
Ultimately total pain avoidance leads to greater pain then if we had endured and worked though the pain initially. We were born to pain - labor pains. Chances are we'll go out to pain - many won't have the good fortune of going in our sleep, dreaming of breakfast or flying on angel wing, then simply floating away - like my 97 year old aunt did. Of course we don't really know. She could also have opened her eyes one last time, looked around at pictures with the clear eyes of a 20 year old, at the comfortable old slippers and her favorite coffee cup. Maybe in her minds eye she looked at her little apartment - more pictures and gifts from grand kids and greats, the kitchen that she only yesterday had used, that last little slice of cornbread or banana bread she'd been saving for coffee and the home attendant who lay sleeping on the sofa. She might fret about her being the one to find her cold and still in the morning. Maybe she then thought sadly 'I'm gonna miss you all so. Then maybe - she closed her eyes and was gone.
So my point is this - pain is a part of life and we should not only accept it, but embrace it as affirmation that we're dong the right things. In other words, if there is some suffering on your part - it's probably a good thing. Example - if you're looking for a job then you should be tired at the end of the day. Looking for a job is a job. You have to start early and end late. You have to juggle, coordinate schedules, plan your time and have a game plan. To do the things you need to do should and will drain if you're doing it right.
Good pain - makes you stronger. You have to know the difference between good pain and bad. Going to the gym and being sore after - good pain. Working on a piece of equipment and feeling a sharp stabbing pain - bad pain - you should stop and get a demonstration from someone who knows. Spending an hour or so cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming and sweeping, putting away clothes, is an aerobic activity - good pain. Burns calories, de-clutters the household so that everyone can think and is gratifying to you and can be a source of pride. Good pain.
Doing that kind of work only to have someone come home and belittle, criticize, bully and insult and possibly brutalize or at least keep you in a constant state of fear - Bad Pain. Your response should be to work as hard as possible to get out. Don't hide behind a religion that prohibits or discourages divorce from a crazy person. The person who is brutalizing you, that you are allowing to hold you hostage, doesn't need spiritual counseling. He might need long term substance abuse rehabilitation, he might need job training, skill building, support groups - his issues are so beyond the scope of a group of old men wagging fingers and reminding him of his spiritual responsibilities. Once again - Bad Pain.
If your teenager wants a new game system and you've set some grade point requirements, that teen will be stronger and better prepared for life if he/she puts in the time and effort to attain that grade point average. If you're willing to devote your time to something, exercise your brain or muscles, you will be rewarded and the work in itself is both healthy and rejuvenating. The longer you embrace it the better you feel.
Whereas, being lazy, looking for the short cuts in life the hook ups, freebies, doing the bare minimum, is exhausting and only marginally effective. You end up working harder avoiding work then if you had done the work in the first place. You know what I'm saying - you do a shoddy job today, you'll just end up having to do it over later on, possibly damaging some of the key components or losing them, so when you do you have to buy more parts, incur more expenses, delays, etc.
Getting 'free money' from the state - sounds good, might not be. There are some unspoken expenses when you take money from the state - strings attached that you should consider. It's like inviting the government into your living room and having to offer them pastries and coffee; they how have a say in everything you do. The government has an extra pair of eyes watching you. You're getting aid for food to feed your children, then they can verify that you are using it for that if they choose to. Granted those eyes are distracted and overworked at best and they have so many families that if they are looking, it's only a glance at best/worst. But it's called Temporary Assistance to Needy Families, emphasis on temporary. That means that you should be working your butt off trying to get to a point where you don't need it anymore. Move out of the way for people behind you on their way up the food chain.
But back to my cousin ' Fark'. This man is in his 50's now and to use the word sporadic to describe his work experience is stretching the word as far as any semi-literate person cold. I've known him to quit jobs because he didn't want to go home from a party. So F-it, this party is so hot, I'll just skip going to my second day on the job and for that matter the 3rd. through never returning. Seriously. He's shacked up with weak women solely for an address. He's had to go crawling to his smug older brother over and over for money while having to endure the visible shame, pity and outright revulsion his brother has for his place in life. One good thing is he hasn't had any children with these ill fated liaisons, so no little 'Farks' running around avoiding work and working harder.
So get comfortable with 'Pain is Good. It's going to be around for a while and with you for a while. Just be able to tell the difference between good pain and bad. To feel pain and work through the suffering and sacrifice and then realizing the reward of progress is the stuff of life that makes the sweetest memories. These will be the stories of courage that you will tell your kids and grands. They will then use them as guideposts and anchors to help them on their way in life. These are the things that make up legacies and family histories to be witnessed to at family reunions and should be memorialized. Pain is Good.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Why this blog?
I can't afford therapy. Bottom line - yet I know that I have a lot of pent up rage and that's just not healthy. Not the bottom line part - the pent up rage part. Anyway. In therapy you talk to someone in some pretend, thought up way which is supposed to lead to some epiphany, original pain, someone who seems bred to irritate that pain, a personal revelation or at least action plan out of whatever situation you find yourself. And recovery or at least blissful ignorance.
This blog will represent the talking part. I will vent - in whatever way I choose, and others will read and either commiserate or be completely and diametrically opposed and vehemently express their compassion or disgust with my hypothesis. Or not.
Either way - I get to vent - scream to the top of my lungs with fury or moan incoherently (then again may be not - Don't Drink and Blog) or chuckle or laugh out loud. And you, the reader, get to empathize, pity or generally feel superior to, maybe have a chuckle or two and possibly a different/similar point of view. You also get to exercise a part of your psyhe that finds the common good and flaws in us all.
I have blogged in other places, in my journey to now. I've found that the word 'social' doesn't have a common meaning and too much emphasis on the cover photo and too little on the words. I still believe the ultimate goal of writing (communicating) is to convey an idea so that it is understood in it's entirety by everyone who reads it.
That includes the tone and nuances. Hence - grammar is, most times - important. Punctuation is abundandly helpful to guide you through whatever your argument is. So you may have a compelling and engaging story of being done wrong while serving your country and being faithful while pining away for your true love - but I'll never know because my vision gets blurry searching for a period or a comma at least to let me know that you've come to the end of your thought. Phew - that was tough. Oh to be able to find someone to chat with (both 21st. and 20th. century meaning) who has a command of the english language, isn't a complete slave to his dick, employed with a profession firmly in hand and is hot to look at too!
So that's what I'll be doing here. Getting therapy, airing out my diry laundry, taking ownership for what is my personal responsibility, being vulnerable and human, being in touch with my meminine/masculine side, taking care of the hidden ghosts that haunt. All under the cloak of anonymity that the internet provides. Yes - I've found it! The holy grail of mental health care in America! The Internet. I just have to get through that whole - filter-through-the-stuff-that's-just-trash to the stuff-that's-gold and we've got a winner. And that just takes diligence and I've got that to spare.
So now - Rules.
1. Whatever your point of view - I need to understand it. Punctuation. Use it.
2. Despite the bravado displayed in this intro - I am but a delicate flower... until you F with my kids.
3. Send me your stories, your jokes, 'can't believe it' tales, opinions, advice, poetry, song lyrics and questions. I'll do my best to respond and thend send the ball off sailing on to others to think about and exercise those valuable synapses and other brain tissue, and we can converse/share the way that our ancestors once did only via optic fible cable and swift processors.
4. Be human with your venom and try not to slice too deeply. Im but a poor,middle class hopeful single mom trying to keep it together long enough to raise and present her kids onto an unsuspecting general public. Be kind.
Now I must be off to masturbate. Just kidding. Does sound like a good idea though. Been a while and I do have the time....hmmmm?
Yeah - like I'm gonna tell you !
This blog will represent the talking part. I will vent - in whatever way I choose, and others will read and either commiserate or be completely and diametrically opposed and vehemently express their compassion or disgust with my hypothesis. Or not.
Either way - I get to vent - scream to the top of my lungs with fury or moan incoherently (then again may be not - Don't Drink and Blog) or chuckle or laugh out loud. And you, the reader, get to empathize, pity or generally feel superior to, maybe have a chuckle or two and possibly a different/similar point of view. You also get to exercise a part of your psyhe that finds the common good and flaws in us all.
I have blogged in other places, in my journey to now. I've found that the word 'social' doesn't have a common meaning and too much emphasis on the cover photo and too little on the words. I still believe the ultimate goal of writing (communicating) is to convey an idea so that it is understood in it's entirety by everyone who reads it.
That includes the tone and nuances. Hence - grammar is, most times - important. Punctuation is abundandly helpful to guide you through whatever your argument is. So you may have a compelling and engaging story of being done wrong while serving your country and being faithful while pining away for your true love - but I'll never know because my vision gets blurry searching for a period or a comma at least to let me know that you've come to the end of your thought. Phew - that was tough. Oh to be able to find someone to chat with (both 21st. and 20th. century meaning) who has a command of the english language, isn't a complete slave to his dick, employed with a profession firmly in hand and is hot to look at too!
So that's what I'll be doing here. Getting therapy, airing out my diry laundry, taking ownership for what is my personal responsibility, being vulnerable and human, being in touch with my meminine/masculine side, taking care of the hidden ghosts that haunt. All under the cloak of anonymity that the internet provides. Yes - I've found it! The holy grail of mental health care in America! The Internet. I just have to get through that whole - filter-through-the-stuff-that's-just-trash to the stuff-that's-gold and we've got a winner. And that just takes diligence and I've got that to spare.
So now - Rules.
1. Whatever your point of view - I need to understand it. Punctuation. Use it.
2. Despite the bravado displayed in this intro - I am but a delicate flower... until you F with my kids.
3. Send me your stories, your jokes, 'can't believe it' tales, opinions, advice, poetry, song lyrics and questions. I'll do my best to respond and thend send the ball off sailing on to others to think about and exercise those valuable synapses and other brain tissue, and we can converse/share the way that our ancestors once did only via optic fible cable and swift processors.
4. Be human with your venom and try not to slice too deeply. Im but a poor,middle class hopeful single mom trying to keep it together long enough to raise and present her kids onto an unsuspecting general public. Be kind.
Now I must be off to masturbate. Just kidding. Does sound like a good idea though. Been a while and I do have the time....hmmmm?
Yeah - like I'm gonna tell you !
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